Before you start saying, "These haven't been revealed yet," please hear me out. This is a solid prediction that I believe has an almost certain chance of being correct, so I'm willing to lay out my reputation and pride on what are almost certainly the Pokémon starters for Pokémon Legends: Z-A.
How the prediction works:
The crux of this prediction is to accurately and psychologically evaluate the previous starters and where the Pokémon company currently is in their thought processes. Remember that Pokémon are marketable, and increasing marketability in a way that makes us happy is the core focus, especially on those who missed the mark the first time around.
At its crux, the Legends series is there to create new, safe content away from the mainstream games before having it adapted ready for Pokémon's competitive scene via Pokémon Home. The previous starters had a number of attributes that made them viable for this type of game.
The previous games starter lineup.
The first:
Each starter had a third evolution with no additions. Typhlosion, Decidueye and Samurott were untouched before Legends Arceus. This allowed them to be given new forms and allowed players to bond with these Pokémon in new ways. It was an elevation effort that worked well. I highly doubt they would change this aspect of the formula.
The second:
Each starter had a final form with attributes of a significantly popular and relevant member of the Hisui native Pokémon.
Typhlosion - Took elements from Spiritomb.
Both absorb and manipulate spirits, same colour and typing.
Decidueye - Took elements from Infernape.
Same colour scheme and fighting typing
Samurott - Took elements from Zoroark (Re-introduced in this game, shiny form takes elements of Hisuian Zoroark)
Same colour and typing, now much more devious.
The third:
None of these starters infringed on the current Pokémon game out at the time, that being Sword and Shield. The last thing Game Freak wants to do is waste precious marketing opportunities on the same Pokémon.
So, given these elements, let's start deleting starter Pokémon that cannot be part of this game:
Gen1:
Bulbasaur, Charmander and Squirtle are out; they're in Pokémon Unite, used in a lot of projects, and already have megas/different forms.
Gen 2:
Cyndaquil is out, leaving Totodile and Chikorita as viable. Chikorita especially gets the nod here due to their designmatching the Kalos aesthetic.
Gen 3:
Treecko, Torchic and Mudkip are all out. They already have Mega forms and will likely be catchable in the game.
Gen 4:
Turtwig and Piplup are viable; however, I think Chimchar is out due to aesthetics not matching. Piplup gets the nod due to Kalos being based on France and Empoleon being based on Napoleon Bonaparte.
Gen 5:
Snivy and Tepig are viable. Oshawott will not return for a second time.
Gen 6:
It would make no sense to have a Kalos variant of the starters already from there. All out.
Gen 7:
Litten and Popplio are viable, but Rowlett won't return. Primarina gets the nod as her musical nature ties her to French nobility and culture. They could very well gain a Marie Antoinette variation.
Gen 8:
Sobble and Grookey are too British to ever make their way to a France-inspired region. Scorbunny, however, finds a place in the quite amazing Football/Soccer scene that exists within the country. Scorbunny gets the nod.
Gen 9:
Too new and fresh, All out.
So we have our list of contenders.
Grass:
Turtwig
Snivy
Chikorita
Water:
Totodile
Piplup
Popplio
Fire:
Litten
Tepig
Scorbunny
Grass starter:
Now, I'm going to start deep diving. In terms of grass, we are looking for a Pokémon who has fallen behind in cultural terms. Turtwig is still fresh from the last generation. Both in BDSP and Legends Arceus, so we're gonna strike them out. For this reason, I have to remove Piplup. BSDP's existence, while it didn't add anything new, was enough to disqualify them. Chikorita and Snivy both have excellent arguments for their inclusion, but for Kalos, we're going to bring in the second rule:
Snivy does not have much in the way of design to give them the attributes of a Kalos Pokémon. When we think of Kalos, we think of extravagant lights, design, and all-around beauty. Snivy and, by extension, Serperior, have tiny stubby arms, which leave little to work with for an extravagant Pokémon.
It's for this reason that I dub Chikorita as the Legends A-Z grass starter. Meganium is often considered useless and needs the boost a new mega form would give. Meganium could easily turn their spores into Lights and become a Fairy-type Kalosian form. And finally, the company that brought us Lechonk will not pass up "Mega-Meganium.
Kalos Meganium - With elements from Vivillon, as a Grass/Fairy-type.
Vivilon's many patterns could be transposed onto Meganiums' petals.
Water Starter:
Well, as I said earlier, Piplup is sadly out. BDSP just makes it too much for Piplup to come back again for this game.
Totodile sadly suffers from something I like to call "We are not in Unova right now", as a Crocodile would be perfect for an American-themed region. I can imagine Feraligater getting its own Florida-style form. But as it is, I believe the most fitting starter is the beautiful Primarina that evolves from Popplio. I can see their singing becoming elegant and strong. Music is especially powerful in France, and her water could easily be inspiring and help mold the architecture of Lumiose City.
Kalos Primarina - With visual elements from Furfrou, as a Water/Electric-type
A more primped Primarina wearing a Furfrou headdress is what I imagine.
Fire Starter:
Well, I thought Scorbunny might have been a dead cert for this one. Tepig really doesn't stand out to me as a French Pokémon however, the more I thought about it, the more I came to understand just how much Tepig fills this entire criteria I've set up. They're underused and underappreciated. They're a Fire/Fighting-type, making them follow in the footsteps of other starters, which I believe would be a prime candidate for a Kalosian type change. And finally, they have a very strong candidate in what their Kalosian form could bring.
Are you ready for this? Flying Pig. I fully believe that Tepigs fighting style could lend him the attributes of Hawlucha. Introduced in Gen 6, Hawlucha was one of the most popular Fighting-type Pokémon from Kalos. And if the pattern holds. I believe Tepig fits the bill immensely. Imagine Emboar but with flames that let them fly and perform body slams from the sky.
Kalos Emboar - With elements of Hawlucha as a Fire/Flying-type.
You just know this Pig could lose a few pounds and start flying body slamming things. "When pigs fly".
So, without a doubt, these are the Z-A starters:
Chikorita
Tepig
Popplio
If you're here after the actual reveal and I was completely wrong, come laugh at me in the comments, but if I was right well… give me a thumbs up! Au revoir mes amis!
My Experience in the Marvel Rivals Closed Alpha Test
When I first saw Marvel Rivals, I thought the same thing as everyone else did at the time: "Oh, it's Overwatch with Marvel characters". But when you look past the surface level and play the game, Marvel Rivals becomes an entirely different beast altogether. Marvel Rivals operates on an interesting thought process. It takes everything that made Overwatch 1 fun and improves on it in new and fresh ways.
Marvel Rivals is a 6 v 6 team battle arena game. It is marketed as a shooter, as all characters have a ranged attack of some regard. Characters are taken directly from the Marvel Universe, and each has a fresh coat of paint to match the game's aesthetic. Multiverse law is in effect, with the game's mascot being Galacta, a little-known non-canon child of Galactus. She takes the place of the announcer. While there are threads of an overarching story and plot points, these were not very present in the Alpha.
Announcer and mascot Galacta, probably the perfect fusion of Marvel and Overwatch aesthetics.
The goal of the game varies depending on the game mode. At times, you're pushing an objective; at others, you're battling over a command point. Teams are placed onto attack or defense, and matches will usually result in teams engaging in combat with each other, trying to gain the upper hand to win team-based fights or close combat fights down side routes. Aiming and precision are key for some characters, but others can use abilities to create wide and interesting attacks that don't require good aim.
Every character is unbalanced in the right hands. And that level of strength is mirrored across all characters. Starlord has the ability to melt larger characters with his quick-fire handguns; Hulk can withstand damage and brawl effectively, and Luna Snow can heal allies and herself while still dealing worthwhile damage. Every character in this game provides at least one aspect of damage dealing and one of support. What those forms take is related to the character. However, I often found that each hero is over-tuned in at least one aspect. What this leaves us with is this feeling of characters being unfair, but perhaps that's okay because your character is also unfair.
Team ups are the game's signature mechanic
For example, Black Panther excels in one-on-one combat, gaining more damage as they take hits. But when facing a group, he dies too fast to be effective. Storm has the ability to buff her team, but she is constantly flying and stands out far more than other characters when she takes action. Spider-Man is incredibly hard to hit as he zips around the field but cannot deal substantial damage, meaning you have to plan in advance how much damage to deal and then escape quickly.
Capture the point gameplay is a giant funnel
Some of the most memorable moments from the Alpha were Scarlet Witch exploding, killing five people numerous times, Rocket Racoon consistently reviving his team, making efforts near futile, and Luna Snow making people immortal from the back lines, including herself. There is also the ever-present fear of being melted should you walk in front of three characters with a low HP character. And finally, the team-up mechanic which ranges from ineffective and strange to funny levels of broken with the likes of Magneto and Scarlet Witch providing the player with an infinite range melee attack that deals a bit too much damage.
Doctor Strange's shield protects from a lot but he can't attack during it
So, in conclusion, Marvel Rivals is shaping up to be a game that brings back the glory days of Overwatch that have long since been taken away. The designs are flawless, and character mechanics seem to be very well thought out, even if a little generic for this type of game. I would liken it to Overwatch and Valorants' baby that got into Marvel movies in a big way. Time will tell to see if this game can take the reins as the premier Team shooter, but honestly, with how hard Overwatch 2 is tanking its own goodwill, this game may just take its place as a game that actively puts fun before balance or meta definitions.
The game recently got announced for consoles and is entering a Closed Beta phase in July.
Knuckles Episode 1-3 Review: An Underrated Good Time
Knucklesis a spin-off series from the Sonic the Hedgehogmovie universe airing on the Paramount Plus streaming service. Focusing on the red echidna debuting in Sonic the Hedgehog 2, Knuckles is given a mission to train minor comedy relief character Wade Whipple into becoming a warrior just like him. However, the story begins to show a much deeper narrative as it goes on. We'll discuss episodes 1, 2, and 3 of the series and its strengths and weaknesses.
Episode 1
The first episode is a really strong first outing. We see Sonic, Tails and Knuckles coming to terms with their new life on Earth, with Knuckles struggling to adapt to a peaceful life unlike his friends. After Sonic fails to persuade him to feel more at ease, Knuckles' spiritual ancestor arrives to tell him to turn a certain human into a warrior "worthy of the Echidna name." Idris Elba is amazing in this role and gives Knuckles a powerful aura, even during comedic moments.
Knuckles' idea of "home".
The human is Wade Whipple, the town's bumbling sheriff character from the movies, played by Adam Pally. His goal is to win a bowling tournament, but he has issues with being intimidated by his opponents. Upon meeting with Wade, Knuckles starts to give his all, encouraging Wade to be a stronger person. And Wade starts to rub off on Knuckles with his carefree and fun attitude. It's at this point I began to realize the show is a road trip type deal. Wade is so unthreatening that Knuckles can become more at ease, and Wade is inspired by Knuckles, who shows no fear in the face of danger.
This is Wade, I liked Wade. He's got a real down to Earth charm to him.
Then, the villains appear. Two "G.U.N." agents working with a shady arms dealer to kidnap Knuckles for his power. I do love that this crazy special ops group exists now and has tabs on all of the three alien Sonic characters. They ambush Knuckles and Wade at a bowling alley with tech powered by scavenged quills from Knuckles. At this point, we get to the worst part of the episode, where Agent Mason, played by Kid Cudi, tries to imitate one of the most memorable lines from Sonic the Hedgehog 2, flubs it, then gets absolutely destroyed in combat. It just really leaves a mental disgust in my brain for this character to quote Knuckles despite not being involved at the time of the movie.
The fight scene is quite well done, with impressive choreography and special effects. But they do win in the end. The only reason they capture Knuckles is a cheap teleport while Knuckles is gloating over his victory. I love this. Knuckles' main flaw is his gullibility. He let his guard down, and it led to this, which is absolutely on point. This leaves Wade having a panic attack as the only one who can save Knuckles.
The bowling aesthetic and low lighting ambience really does add to this scene.
Episode 1 is probably the strongest of the first three episodes, possibly the whole show. It introduces comic villains, lays down backstory for the universe, establishes that Sonic, Tails and Knuckles are considered heroes who saved the world, and at the same time establishes just how revered the series’ main antagonist, Robotnik, was. Knuckles and Wade are both given some strong character, with it being clear that Knuckles' ghost dad character is manipulating his ego to put him on a path that will make him more content with his new life. These two characters need each other to grow and become better. The show does a brilliant job of paving the way for the story ahead.
Episode 2
In this episode, we get the biggest reference to Sonic lore so far with the "Ice Cap" resort. Where the bad guys are holding Knuckles. There's one of those "Are we sure this is for kids?" moments where Knuckles gleefully recounts to the villains how many of their bones he will break once he escapes. One of the villains, Agent Willoughby, played by Ellie Taylor, gets some characterization with Knuckles. Willoughby clearly has massive insecurity issues, claiming she's far, far worse than Robotnik and basically taunting an animal in a cage. Knuckles, however, is unimpressed. I found this scene very funny. It was a cartoony version of Hannibal Lecter taunting his foes from captivity.
Knuckles proves he is too hard headed to be intimidated even while caged up.
Wade gets a fantasy flashback where he pretends to be James Bond, going through an elaborate and extensive escape attempt, which fails immediately when he sets off his fireworks at the front door. It leads him to an encounter with Kid Cudi, who beats him up and then takes a phone call from his mother during the one-sided punch-up. It's funny but more because it's absurd than anything.
Wade's James Bond fantasy pushes the limits on being cheesy.
Wade comes through and lucks out on freeing Knuckles. Then they escape with Knuckles carrying Wade to safety by gliding off a mountain. This gliding scene is perfect for fans of the game. Knuckles' glide is an iconic part of his mobility, and to see it in live-action is fantastic since it wasn't shown in the movie.
After this, we get some of the best dialogue in this show. Knuckles completely shut down Wade's escape attempt as the fluke it was. But Wade counters by saying that even if it was a fluke, it was still a win because some days you just have to take a win where you can get it. Knuckles accepts this and begins to learn more humility, while Wade accepts that it wasn't the perfect plan. It's kind of beautiful how these two bond over failures. Also, Wade has a bounty put on his head for freeing Knuckles. Whoops!
Knuckles' gliding gives the same energy as a Harry Potter flying segment.
We can really start to see how the show, at its core, wants to teach how it's okay to mess up because your loved ones can still pull you through the bad times. I've seen people complain about how the show doesn't have enough Knuckles and focuses on Wade for a lot of the run time, but I don't think this show would work without that dynamic.
Episode 3
This episode was mentally taxing. If only for the sheer weirdness of what transpires. I honestly believe this episode to be like a car crash that you have to watch to understand what's happening.
So, after the previous episode, Wade decides to hide at his mother’s house, and it turns out he hasn't visited in two and a half years. And we quickly seem to understand why. Wade's sister appears, who works for the FBI but has the manner and charm of the evil babysitter from the Fairly Odd Parents. After Wade’s mother sees Knuckles, she faints because, as you know, he's a small red alien to most people in this universe. I'm glad that hasn't been forgotten about. But upon waking, she and Knuckles have a good rapport, and Knuckles treats her with high respect as the "Chief of the Whipple clan," which is an endearing character trait for him. My man Knux has some really good manners.
Knuckles gets scanned for weapons and somehow avoids saying "I am the weapon". Good for him.
She invites him to stay for Shabbat, a traditional Jewish holiday. Which, according to Wade, is always a complete disaster. It becomes clear that this is because their family cannot actually get along with each other because his sister is what I can only describe as "The worst person ever." Constantly lying, belittling Wade, disrespecting her mother and flashing her FBI badge everywhere like it makes her superior. We can see Wade's attempts to stand up for himself are not effective, making it understandable why he has an issue with people intimidating him.
Knuckles, however, spends his time during this meal bonding with Wade’s mother, talking about his past with her drawing parallels to the plight of the Jewish people. This is concerning when you consider that would make the owls, the show's equivalent of the bad guys from World War 2, and Sonics Guardian, who was portrayed as a good and caring parental figure, has now been branded one by the show. Did I mention that this is a kid’s show?
Dinner breaks down into family squabbles. At which point the bounty hunters attack! Aiming to bring in Wade for his $100'000 reward? Who is paying for this? I do not know, but I could swear they were after Knuckles. I guess it's just too difficult to put a price on someone who shouldn't exist. The family trys to fend them off while Knuckles is shown to effortlessly deal with them. There's an inventive sequence where Wade's mom begs Knuckles to defend the Shabbat candles as they need to go out naturally for the holiday. So, they both engage the bounty hunters while pushing them away from the candles. The cinematography here was impressive, to be honest. I also enjoyed seeing Wade's sister being incredibly ineffective, trying to flash her badge and getting nothing in return. We see Wade taunt a villain, seeing Knuckles about to arrive. It's a nice little bit of character growth sharing a tiny bit of Knuckles' ego.
Before...
and After.
This episode drew a lot of concerning parallels between the world of Sonic the Hedgehog and religion, which is an inventive path to take but not one that I would have done myself. The funniness of Knuckles being a good guest while surrounded by the dumpster fire, which is Wade's family, was a pretty good laugh, and him joyfully beating up the bounty hunters was brilliant! The ending moral, where the family all stick together against the intruders and the mother says it was the best one they've ever had, was touching. Knuckles may just have found the benefits of other tribes and embracing their customs. Which is good for the overall narrative of this show, which is about adapting to an unfamiliar world. Wade proves himself an anchor to this, and in my opinion, it makes him an anchor that Knuckles needs.
Knuckles taunts in the middle of a fight. Love these tiny character moments.
I haven't watched episodes 4, 5 and 6 at the time of writing this. But so far, I feel this show has a good framework, lovable characters, really dislikeable characters when they're meant to be, and some interesting references to Sonic media. It takes the essence of the movies and translates them into a TV series quite effectively. While I personally found the addition of humans in the movies a waste of screen time, I do not feel the same with Wade and his extended family. Wade provides an invaluable window into humanity for Knuckles, and I love to see their bond affect them both in positive ways. While the humor in the series may be a little hit-and-miss, the overall narrative is filled with an understanding of Knuckles as a character and what he would need to embrace a life without combat. I also feel the villains embody that goofy Saturday morning cartoon evil that we've been missing in Sonic media. They have the tools to be evil but seem reckless and prone to failure. We need that.
Tell me what you thought of everything in the comments. It's well worth watching even as just a couple of hours of free time on a night one day. I found it a good use of my time, and I feel you will, too.
These credits are so innocent and filled with nostalgia, I love them.
Unicorn Overlord: Trends Weigh Down an Otherwise Fantastic Strategy Game
Unicorn Overlord by Vanillaware is a game that follows the Tactical RPG genre. A type of game that has spent the last decade being less about combat and more about character-driven stories and dating simulations. The likes of Fire Emblem, Dark Deity, and Disgaea are among those who have forgotten the focus on strategy, deviating from the more classical tactical fare like Final Fantasy Tactics or even the criminally underrated Pokemon Conquest. Whether this is a good or bad thing is up to the player, but you can't deny that a keen eye and focus on fanservice has catapulted those games into high sales figures and attracted a fanbase.
Unicorn Overlord falls somewhere in the middle of the fanservice and tactical affairs. Trying to provide an experience that caters to the widest possible audience, but unfortunately, in its attempts to do everything, it instead becomes jarring as its story suffers from what feels like interference, possibly from inclusions forced on the developers by higher-ups. At its core, this title feels to be a game drowned in glitter. Once you scrape away all the shiny additions, there is a good game underneath, but you may find yourself cleaning glitter off your shirt for too long to realize.
C'mon guys the beach trip was next week! It's war this week!
So, let's talk about the truly good parts. Unicorn Overlord has some deep strengths. As said before, this game boasts an incredibly in-depth combat system. Your units become pieces of armies you form and then move around a map to combat enemy armies on large and unique maps. Once engaged with each other, they fight in a 3x3 grid until their ability points are depleted. It's very similar to a pre-prepared auto battler in this sense, except that you have a complete analytical advantage over the computer. Before every battle, you'll have the advantage of re-positioning, re-arming, and coming up with the best situation to combat your opponents.
It's like Chess, but you set up the board.
Your armies' individual units can dodge, block, and be hurt by various weaknesses, and it's up to you to organize your individual armies to fend off specific threats, especially bosses which require you to engage your brain neurons as to which setup you should send to gain an advantage. But that's not all. On some maps, you'll be fulfilling objectives that require you to get to places quick enough to save NPCs, some to capture certain points on the map, and one map required me to capture and have an army occupy three separate points to prevent the enemy from respawning.
If I had to liken the game to anything, I would say it fulfills the potential Yu-gi-oh the Falsebound Kingdom had many years ago but improves upon it immensely. I don't know how much of a nerd it makes me to remember a Gamecube game from 2003, but Unicorn Overlord seems like the logical progression of that game's overworld combat system. It even has the addition of a timer to ensure you can't cheese stages. I love it as it makes you want to win with good fundamentals and improve your gameplay.
Welcome to fantasy Siberia! Full of animal people and snow.
Next, stories and characters. It's very difficult to differentiate this game from other popular releases of the last few years. Not to go too much into spoilers, but the main plot is a typical Fire Emblem plot, which bizarrely turns into Octopath Traveler the further into the game you go. Something positive it borrows from, however, is Chrono Trigger. Where you can trigger the end fight at any point in the game. The cutscene you're given will change depending on how far you've progressed. I appreciate being allowed to joyously gain end-game spoilers with the opening cutscene of this event at any point I wish.
Recruitable characters are a mixed bag in this game. You'll have some who have interesting plots and lives of their own to explore, like the tri-unicorn group, who are very skilled mercenaries weighed down by their inability to depend on each other. Or Clive and Monica's arranged marriage, which became real, but neither can accept the other. Typically, characters will either have immense unrequited love for the main character or simply stop existing in any meaningful way after recruitment.
No option to start dancing, would love for Alain to just do the macarena after destroying their army.
The villains are evil! Most of the people you fight are either brainwashed and recruited after the fact or are suffering from Saturday morning cartoon fever, making them ridiculously evil because, well… They're evil! They come from a bad place! (No, not Michigan). I don't really know what much else to say about Galerius or Baltro other than their motivation is just to do evil things. There's no moral ambiguity here.
Finally, we have the main character Alain. He is your typical forgotten prince whose only discernible character trait is "I must save the kingdom," along with blue hair. Along the way, you get to choose some political decisions he makes, but the effects of these are minimal. Mostly, a few executions or pardons. It's a nice addition that gives an illusion of choice.
Despite Alain being a one-note character, almost every woman in this game shows romantic interest in him because they have to for the marriage plot. Even his cousin can be forced into this. And the worst part? It's mandatory. You have to take part in a marriage ceremony with someone, or you don't get access to your ring's true strength. The game sure lets you try, but the final battle has an area where, without the ring's power, you will probably just die.
On the plus side, the game will let you marry whoever you want so that's brilliant. The only crime is being single.
For being your central focus and a messiah-type character, Alain is not worthy of note and feels like he could be replaced with a cactus, and nothing would be different. I know that Lords in these games aren't typically motivated by much else other than winning the campaign, but it would be nice if Alain liked dumplings or something similar.
All in all, Unicorn Overlord is a fantastic strategy game. Its well-thought-out mechanics and gameplay loop are very satisfying and any true strategy fan will see the wealth of merit this title possesses. However, in almost every area, I felt like I was being slapped in the face by "Mandated fanservice time." At one point, a cutscene started where they introduced a Juggernaut tank lady who is double the size of any main character, at least 8 feet tall, with a unique class… She has gaps in her armor where an average size person would be within stabbing reach.
The worst part here was that you win this giant woman like a trophy for completing the gladiatorial combat arena. A jarring addition considering this arena is opened up during enemy occupation. My immersion in this wartime military campaign game was routinely shattered every time as it demanded investment in this game's world and the suffering of its people. But then comes out with stuff in almost every area that was added to appeal to something else entirely. It's almost like it wanted to take good things from other games and put them on top of its already good gameplay. And if the game can't take itself seriously and have faith in its own premise? I don't really see how I can.
Did you enjoy this game? Let me know in the comments.
Hold on let me grab my "Go for the exposed skin" ability.
The Top 10 Paladins in Video Games
Some might say I'm a paladin enjoyer. My first DnD character was a paladin; when I booted up Baldur's Gate 3, the first thing I did was make an Oath of Vengeance paladin. I am eternally attracted to characters who follow the path of a holy knight. So, it got me thinking, just who are the best fighters for the holy light? The cream of the crop when it comes to smiting?
Firstly, the criteria: what we're counting as a Paladin here is someone who balances the delicate line of being a warrior and a cleric, warriors on their own won't count here, so no Kratos, also pure Clerics won't count either due to their faith forming the majority of their capabilities. However, a character will not necessarily have to be labeled a paladin; they only follow the aesthetic to a tee. Their power has to essentially come from the willpower their oath gives, whether that be self-given, or from an organization.
The definition of a Paladin that I'm going with is an ideal-driven character who follows a distinct set of morals that would count as an oath. So this means I can accept a typical medieval holy knight, but I could also accept a heavy-armored Warhammer 40k crusader with a rocket launcher.
10 Flynn Scifo - Tales of Vesperia
Flynn is from an old Xbox 360/PS3 JRPG, and whenever I think of how a paladin would act, I end up defaulting to this insufferably stubborn guy, who ignores the main character Yuri's arguments as to why killing is for the greater good, opting instead to take a stance against it, even if the guy who was killed was an irredeemable monster.
Does being against sin make you a paladin? Well, not completely, but couple it with his holy radiant dragon arts and outfit that screams, "Warrior of light," and it becomes quite clear just how intertwined he is with the Paladin aesthetic. His whole idea as a soldier is to try to change the evil empire from the inside.
Eventually, through the story, he sees them as a greater evil and turns on them to join the party, despite his issues with your main character's law-breaking. Quite the judgemental type and a mascot for "Holier than thou" attitudes.
9. Cal Kestis - Star Wars: Jedi series
It was difficult for me to choose a Jedi representative for this list because I had to have one. Most of the prominent Jedi are claimed by the movies, Ahsoka isn't in any games that I know of, and Revan has no definitive path to good or evil, and whatever oath he would follow would be at the player’s discretion. Which is why I've chosen loveable Cal for my 9th spot.
Following his own creed and belief in the force, Cal consistently proves himself a devotee of the force but often finds himself finding the best moral path in his new world without an overabundance of Jedi. It must be pretty tough trying to uphold the tenets of your order when there may not even be an order anymore. His oath belongs to his friends and the force, meriting him the Oath of Protection.
8. Cassandra Pentaghast - Dragon Age Inquisition
Dragon Age's Chantry may not be the purest of organizations, but it's belief in "The Maker", the more benevolent God of the Dragon Age universe. Her calling to follow the Chantry’s leader leads this woman to organize the Inquisition to purge the world of fade creatures. Basically, they are creatures made from magic. Formed from the negative emotions of humanity.
A prominent party member in the Inquisition, she follows the inquisitor into battles and provides a more lawful council should the player require it. She gave up a life as a noble to become a seeker, pretty much an FBI for magic. She plays the part of an advisor and the one who gives your character their authority at the start of the game. Her Oath is to the Chantry's leader, Justinia, the seekers, and The Inquisition. An Oath of Duty.
7. Demitri/Edelgard - Fire Emblem - Three Houses
This is a rather difficult one. Both of these characters follow their ideals and, in their own twisted ways, follow the path of a Paladin. But they're at odds with each other, and neither will back down. It's also very difficult to say who is morally right. Edelgard wishes to tear down a corrupt and despotic regime, and she's willing to do anything to get rid of it. Demitri doesn't believe the cost of tearing it down in blood is acceptable. But he pretty much regards anyone who breaks the peace as subhuman and worthy of shanking.
What we have here is a clash of Oath of Vengeance against Oath of Vengeance. Both of which are born from disgust at the other. Compounded by this, they both wield magical weapons which augment their abilities. Both respective rulers are driven by Oaths to themselves. And between the two, it would not be fair to discount either in favor of the other. So, they both share this spot on my list. I believe without their clashing ideologies, neither would be as enticing as they are.
6. Sora - Kingdom Hearts
This was surprising to me, but Sora meets the criteria for a Paladin. His primary motivation is to protect his friends, and is a devout follower of the light. In fact, he keeps on cradling other people's light and hearts within himself to protect them. Also, during battle, he shouts "LIGHT LIGHT LIGHT" like a crazy maniac. Not to mention, he jumps to serve King Mickey Mouse every time he calls and consistently shows a pattern of solving problems everywhere he goes. Sora fights for the light and for his friends, making this an Oath of Friendship.
Now, please, Sora, it's been 3 years in the game! Can you please let your parents know you're okay?
And he was never seen again…
5. Basim Ibn Ishaq - Assassins Creed Valhalla/Mirage
Paladins can sometimes be a more lawful evil flavor of character; Basim has himself a rather interesting position being part of a Brotherhood of Assassins called the Hidden Ones. They have a creed and work towards stopping ancient evil. It just so happens that Basims' past is a little bit more complicated than I can mention here. And his motivations are often skewed.
Suffice it to say Basim is a trickster who does indeed have an Oath, but while on the surface it may seem like an Oath of Protection against the Order of the Ancients, he veers quite happily into an Oath of vengeance against the Isu at the same time.
It would be easy to say Basim follows the path of a rogue quite easily, but personally, I feel like his determination, inability to stray from his own paths, and willingness to work with the hidden ones at almost every opportunity,make him quite an enigmatic figure who to me embodies the ideals of a neutrally aligned Paladin.
4. 2B - Nier Automata
2B, an android in service to YoRha, has all sorts of robotic enhancements and gadgets, but above all, a mission she must follow at any cost. Why? Because she has no other purpose. The androids of Nier: Automata are clamoring for purpose; 2B just so happens to already have one that's wracking her with guilt and sadness. Worse still, she might already know that their missions to prepare for humanity's return are ultimately fruitless.
Yet she continues slaughtering her robotic brethren if only to fulfill both her programming and her need to serve higher powers. At least until she learns the meaning behind caring for others.
Her oath is to that of order, and within the game, we also see that breaking that oath, even if the reasoning to uphold it is pointless, can still lead to the death of everything you are. Nier Automata tells a perfect story about the tragedy of being unable to change your way of thinking and accepting the new.
"Glory to Mankind."
3. DoomGuy/The Slayer - Doom
Some of you may think "Hold on, Doom isn't a roleplaying game!" But dear reader, I must point you towards Doom RPG and say that this most definitely counts. Mainly because Doomguy is exactly the archetype of Paladin that I wanted on this list. And you most definitely play his role in the game: Role Playing Game!
He is a violent psychopath, hellbent on wiping his hated enemies off the face of hell through any means necessary. His purpose is to slay demons, and he does it with an insane level of vigor.
I assume such a powerful hatred towards Demons must mean he has an oath of vengeance or at least an oath of protection toward humanity. Either way, he has special powers from a divinity machine, which is good enough for my Paladin diagnosis!
The music in the games definitely sounds like what I imagine goes through a Paladin's head when they're destroying heretics.
2. Cecil Harvey - Final Fantasy 4
Cecil narrowly beat out Noctis from Final Fantasy 15 for this spot. But Cecil will always be the Final Fantasy Paladin. Upon realizing the Oath to his empire is morally bankrupt, Cecil becomes a traitor and, together with his party, rebels against his emperor. During the course of his journey, he comes across a cave of trials where his transformation to a paladin is achieved through abandoning his self-hatred.
Cecil's motives and character development throughout the game are quite immense, as he goes from an "Only following orders" type of Dark knight into a warrior of light. It's a classic and iconic embrace of the ideals of heroism and how it's never too late to embrace a new path, even if you're in too deep with a bunch of megalomaniac empire enjoyers. Cecil's oath is to the light and to his partner Rosa, who is a large reason for his character motivation.
1. Arthas Menethil - Warcraft 3
Is there ever going to be a franchise that's done Paladins better than Warcraft? Not only do we have heavyweights, Uther the Lightbringer and Tirion Fordring, but we also have the man himself, Prince Arthas. My absolute favorite story of a Paladins fall from grace I've ever seen. Thrust into an unwinnable situation with his city overrun by undead, Arthas made the tough call to honor his oath and eradicate the city of Stratholme, but faced with increasing desperation, he seeks out power, becomes goaded by a demon, only for the power he sought to consume him and turn him onto the path of becoming the dreaded Lich King.
Arthas is without doubt the quintessential Paladin, a follower of the light, so obsessed with fulfilling his duty that it turned him into what he wished to defend against. Quite similar to the tale of Anakin Skywalker, except unlike Anakin, Arthas was uncompromising, determined, and resourceful enough to fulfill his goal, but at a terrible and unforgivable price. He thought his will was enough to stave off corruption, for a paladin is, by its nature, incorruptible. The tragedy is that he did all this without realizing he had been corrupted long before he took up the cursed blade he sought.
He's The Quintessential Oath of Vengeance example and, in my opinion, the best Paladin example in fiction.
Quote from World of Warcraft beautifully rendered by fr0stmOurne on DeviantArt
Did you enjoy the list? Got any problems or additions? Talk to me in the comments below, and we'll discuss it!
Like a Dragon: Infinite Wealth: In-Depth Review
Like a Dragon: Infinite Wealth, affectionately nicknamed "Yakuza 8", is the newest in the Ryu Ga Gotoku series of games from my nostalgic darling company, SEGA. A brief overview of the series is that they consist of gritty, emotional, and well-detailed crime dramas filled with betrayal, politics, and underworld intrigue, which forms the main story. On top of this, the sub-stories are full of zany and wacky Simpsons-style antics, moral heartwarming tales, and an over-abundance of addictive content. This game features two protagonists: Kazuma Kiryu, who was the series protagonist until the series hard-swerved from beat-em-up to turn-based combat, and Ichiban Kasuga, who was introduced as the new protagonist for the shift in gameplay.
Warning: after this point, we will be delving into spoilers for the entire Yakuza and Like a Dragon series.
Story
Infinite Wealth finds itself in an interesting position in the franchise. Coming off the heels of two games, the first being Like a Dragon and the other being Like a Dragon Gaiden: The Man Who Erased His Name. This game serves as the climax to both these stories. Both men, stuck in their own personal ruts, spend the majority of the story learning to love life again in the island state of Hawaii and dare to tackle its vast criminal empires to save the life of an old woman with a mysterious past. A perfect setting for such a soul-searching game.
The story thus becomes a connecting line between the two, with Kiryu coming to terms with the end of his life fast approaching and Ichiban finally getting to decide his own life, having spent so long of it mired in prison, and Yakuza politics. What this leads to is the most emotional game in the entire series, with both characters' personal journeys leaving me with tears in my eyes at points. I have no doubts that the game pulls out every effort it can to make this a love letter to the entire franchise, using its vast history to solidify Kiryu and contrast his life with Ichibans' in a satisfying way.
Ichiban, Kiryu and friends confront Gangster mob boss Dwight Mendez, modeled on and played by Danny Trejo.
Sub-stories have far more goofy and funny scenarios on Ichibans' side but also provide very emotional beats that show the connection these characters have with the world outside of the criminal underbelly. Would it surprise you if I told you the most intensely emotional substories involve a bunch of gangsters in diapers who ride around in strollers? The game goes out of its way to loop the most absurd premises into heartwarming stories. But at the same time, it really tries to teach. One of my favorite three-part sub-stories was based around the daily routine of a lifeguard and how much respect the profession deserves due to the risk and diligence required. It's very cathartic in that way; you come away from this game emotionally enriched and also a bit more world-savvy too.
This substory revolves around Japanese tourists being scammed, a parrot is trained to land on people's shoulders and make them pay for souvenir pictures. I loved the creativity.
Characters
Kiryu and Ichiban take center stage as the main focus of the story. Kiryu continues his trend of brute forcing his way into everyone's business and finds success through his sheer determination and grit. In my opinion, Kiryu has never been more relatable and cool. Whenever we played as him in previous games, he was an invincible juggernaut, but here we get to see the full impact of his life and lead him through a journey where he just might accept that his life wasn't as harmful to those around him that he believes.
Ichiban, however, has to learn to find his own way in life, without his boss' guidance or plans, and to determine his own path while trying to find his estranged mother. Hawaii is not kind to Ichiban as he regularly finds his naivety leads to people taking advantage of him. This game is a harsh reality lesson for Ichiban, giving him trial after trial, but also a hopeful one. It's clear that the torch is well and truly passed in this game from Kiryu to Ichiban, and honestly, I want to see Ichiban use his leadership skills to their fullest, with the number of people he can rally to his cause. His personality is possibly the most infectious I've ever seen from this series, and the writers deserve a lot of praise.
Two menu screenshots of Kiryu and Ichiban.
New characters are deep and loveable. Tomizawa and Chitose are strong characters with their own styles; Chitose's fighting style feels like she could have come straight from Tekken, with an amazing storyline revolving around constantly betraying everyone, whilst Tomizawa boasts a hilarious taxi-based moveset, with a relevant backstory to the games moral themes.
Chitose Fujinomiya: the Loki of the Like a Dragon universe.
Old characters from Like a Dragon return. Not much has changed about all of the returning cast, but they do gain access to the new classes. One complaint I had was that older characters are just kind of there, with no agency of their own. The game decided to focus far more on the newcomers. If given a choice, I would take the new storylines over rehashing old ones; I guess I just didn't really like the stagnant nature of their participation. Saeko, in particular, gets a massive character assassination, which makes her dislikeable for very little reason. Her relationship with Ichiban is destroyed by bad writing decisions in an attempt to make it plausible for game play elements to happen, such as a dating minigame for Ichiban. The backfire of this means she effectively ghosts him for an entire year despite the events of the last game making them best friends for life. Her drink links with Kiryu don't help this as they make her seem like she does still like him, whilst simultaneously hurting him for a long period of time.
The food looks great in the huge amount of restaurants you can visit through Hawaii and Japan!
Together, these two characters' stories coalesce in an explosive storyline involving the criminal underworlds of both Japan and Hawaii, With Yakuza, American gangs, religious cults and Chinese triads all getting in on the mix. You'll find a wide variety of adversaries, but one of them stood out from the rest.
This guy right here. The best new character.
Fledgling Yakuza boss Yukata Yamai is established as a dangerous force from the start. With the ongoing search for Ichiban's mom, Yamai proves himself to be a tenacious, instinctual and dangerous enemy, employing vicious tactics, such as burning down a forest you're currently in. But as the story progresses, he becomes a mirror for Ichiban, going to extreme lengths to fulfill his goals. Charismatic to a fault to those who work under him, and surprisingly honorable when it comes to a pinch.
We can see that Yamai is a perfect lawful evil counterpart to Ichiban's chaotic good self, and through this, we get one of the best Yakuza rival characters since Goro Majima, in my opinion. His backstory is deep and enriching, and his motives are not so black and white. Towards the end of the story, I felt nothing more than a wish for Yamai to become either a party member in the next game or Ichibans' full-on antagonist. Either is fine; I don't mind SEGA!
Gameplay
Infinite Wealth's gameplay takes many forms. You have your turn-based combat fueled by Ichiban's love of the Dragon Quest series, but much improved from the last installment. Enemies make better use of status effects, enemies are more adapted to the system, and classes get more than enough skills to make all of them stand out amongst themselves. Additionally, Kiryu gains a playstyle based on his origins, with a special attack that changes the gameplay to a beat-em-up in the middle of combat. I had the most fun in this game using Kiryu's absurdly strong personal class, "Dragon of Dojima". The best part of it is, the class gets stronger the more time you spend on Kiryu's personal quests, and coming to terms with his full life from his perspective, a brilliant melding of story and gameplay elements. If you couldn't tell, I found this aspect insanely satisfying!
Fighting at night time has its own ambience.
But this is not the only gameplay you'll find in infinite wealth. There is a wide range of mini-games like Mahjong, Sega Bass Fishing, regular fishing, and the terror that was the dating simulator. You'll also find complete standalone games within this game. For example, the "Sujimon" section is a thinly veiled Pokemon parody where you can recruit the various goons you defeat and use them in battle akin to Pokemon Masters EX gameplay. There's an entire storyline and a robust system to train them.
This is a "Sujimon battle" if you thought Palworld was the only game to let you make humans fight each other this year, think again!
It's time to talk about Dondoko Island, a complete and addictive Animal Crossing parody. You wash up on the beach, find large goofy animal mascot characters, and get to build your own city on this deserted island, except you have to clear out all the trash and kick out all the weird Captain Pugwash rejects using it to dump their trash. You can make whatever you want and make money to use in the main game from it. If you finish the game and turn it into a five-star resort, you get a satellite laser attack for Ichiban, which is quite strong but costs a lot of mana. But this game on its own seems quite addictive outside of the main game benefits. It was still insanely difficult to find space for my giant shrine. I spent far too much time on this part of the game.
Ignore the fur suit monstrosities, look how popular my island is!
Music
However many games this franchise gets, its musical strengths improve with each installment. Their library continues to bring a multitude of vocal tracks, all of which are complimented with fitting battle themes. I'm not sure if continued access to the series library of admittedly excellent vocal tracks can be purely merited to this title, but their inclusion is always welcome. You also get a Walkman with access to a small number of Sega and Atlus tunes to walk around town and listen too.
Outside of vocal tracks, though, you'll find some impressive rock themes. I really couldn't pin down the exact genre this game goes for. To my ears, it was a mix of pop, rock and dubstep with maybe a sprinkle of EDM. Sure, they were pretty funky bops and the Barracuda track stuck out for me, but the stationary music during cutscenes and substories was really satisfying.
The rhythm game section is really fun as long as the background doesn't distract you too much!
Graphics
So, as is typical of me, my opinion of graphics is that I don't care if they're low quality as long as they're aesthetically pleasing. I would take Final Fantasy VII over the likes of a live service game copying and pasting the same tree. This game has some really disturbing designs for enemies, which get a visceral reaction from me, but when it counts, the game has a dark ambiance, mired in the corruption within its intimidating enemies and stakes. All tangled within the beautifully made Hawaii map you'll spend the majority of your time in. They put the effort in where it counts, and I never found the environments repulsive; I just questioned some design choices, like the uncomfortable amount of effort put into oiled-up enemy types. No more complaints from me. It was an immersive experience that I don't regret putting 90 hours into.
Hawaii is gorgeously rendered, wouldn't you say?
Final thoughts
I found myself so immersed in this game's map; everywhere I went, there was something to do. The sujimon section running alongside the main story and substories made it a nightmare for anyone who gets easily distracted. You'll set out to do a main mission, and three hours later, you're spamming the fishing minigame on some random beach. You'll never escape this game's content as long as you're playing it, and without a concerted effort, you'll find you've ignored the 20-hour main story completely right up until the 100-hour mark.
I would like to say that you choose how much you play this game, but the sheer amount of stuff to do is a vortex that sucks your attention in and keeps you entertained with a love story between a crawfish and a hermit crab. This game goes from gameplay strength to gameplay strength incredibly fast, and I would say it's the best Like a Dragon game to ever be made, except the problem remains that Yakuza 0 exists. I can tell this game wants to use it's two protagonist style and create another masterpiece like that one, and while the content amount is astounding, the quality of that game was just ascendant.
Like a Dragon: Infinite Wealth misses being a timeless classic by a very small margin. It borrows from too much else, and it loses something in return for its reliance on other media. This game is the perfect example of why quality over quantity is paramount, as I felt that 10% of the content could have been left out and replaced with something to enrich the rest of the game such as the Sicko snap minigame, or the overabundance of random encounters you're forced into in the world map. All in all, Infinite Wealth is an incredibly rewarding experience that will leave you feeling emotionally and culturally enriched whilst leaving you with a sense of closure on one of video gaming's most iconic characters.
Palworld Active Players Count Goes Nuclear! Is This the Pokémon Killer Game We've Been Waiting For?
A few weeks ago, if you asked me about "The funny Pokémon rip-off game with guns", I'd have laughed and said, "Oh yeah, Palworld, that's finally coming out?" and I'd probably start laughing at how dark the trailer was, how little "Pals" could be put into sweatshops, run power plants and pick up a rocket launcher and blast enemies to kingdom come. "There's no way this game is going to be good," I would say, but I would play it anyway just for the spectacle. I mean, it's gotta be entertaining, right?
Suddenly, to say that this game is a rip-off would be a confusing endeavor. It becomes hard to work out which game any one feature comes from. Almost all designs in this game find inspiration from elsewhere, but they're legally distinct, making them their own thing. In fact, while some attributes are designed to invoke nostalgia it's never completely obvious where a certain Pal might have come from.
Casually watching Pals cook breakfast with a gun out.
Palworld is a perfect storm of the gaming landscape, perfectly targeted at every disgruntled and upset fandom that has ever been and granting their wishes with insane precision. If you've played only one of the games, don't worry; there are features from the other five to keep you entertained. The real strength of Palworld is that it takes from so many popular games, then goes, "I can do that better", and the best thing is, you don't feel like you're playing a game you've played in the past, because, Palworld implements these mechanics at the same time working in unison to create the illusion.
It also has its own identity as "the game where you can do terrible things to your critters". The attraction of Palworld is freedom, even if that's also freedom to be an evil character. One item I got simply states you can butcher pals for their meat, which is a little grim. You can be your pals' best friend or their worst nightmare. Also, the surprising ability to catch humans and make them work for you as well. That took me by surprise; they aren't good at combat or powerful, but you can sell them on the black market. And to think, they said Grand Theft Auto was a bad influence.
You upgrade your character as much as the Pals.
Do you like Fortnite but don't want to be playing "The shooting game with all the kids"? Well, don't worry because this game has incredibly dark humor, so it can't possibly be a kids' game. Soon enough, you'll be shooting your friends in game too when PVP drops, so why not come and experience Pikachu with a gun?
Do you like Ark, but you're tired of the steep learning curve and outdated graphics? Well, Palworld is here with admittedly beautiful graphics rivaling that of any big-budget title. I think they pretty much nailed "Not looking like a mobile game or a Gmod game", as everything in this game is clearly crafted to look amazing. Also, the Pals aren't as aggressive as the dinosaurs. That was what put me off Ark originally. So, I guess this worked on me.
One of the best but overlooked parts of this game is how every model has its own carrying animation.
Early access promises PvP, which will likely take some form of Rust experience and be implanted into the game on specific servers. Rust's map-making feature would be amazing for this game. Hopefully that gets implemented for private servers. The map in Palworld is quite big, and sometimes, the layout can be hard to navigate.
Finally, the one single decisive factor in Pocket Pair's success is The Pokémon Company. Pokémon has always been popular, but over the past few years, they've really had this atmosphere of letting the fans down. releasing supposedly unpolished games, not making more Pokémon Legends Arceus DLC, and the backlash towards Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Shining Pearl. Players have wanted more effort put into Pokémon games for the better part of a decade and have remained unfulfilled until now. It's the promise, and the solution to a very long absence of care put into monster-catching games, and this game seems to have hooked onto that feeling. This game, right here, is the one that made the bar. Not TemTem, not Coromon, not Monster Sanctuary, but this. I honestly can understand it, this is the first game to deliver a satisfying experience on Early access launch in the monster hunting genre outside of well… Monster Hunter.
This gives me World of Warcraft flying mount vibes.
So, after playing the game for about 25 hours over the last three days, I can confirm that this game is addictive, but is it good? Well, that remains to be seen. This is an early-access game, and I've seen loads of bugs already. Pals' falling through the ceiling, getting stuck on your buildings, and falling asleep on the air fryer. It still needs to be polished, and for a sandbox game, completing the syndicate towers on one server is going to take you at least 60 hours, so I haven't gotten the full early access experience yet.
So, for 25 hours of fun monster catching, base building, egg hatching game play, was I happy? Oh yeah, absolutely. Gathering eggs and seeing what I get from my loot box style hatching was really tickling my trading card-loving brain. The guns are okay, but honestly, I don't care much about the guns. I found this build where I can put 5 of the pal Daedream into my party and have them all just fire a ton of energy balls at my target, completely destroying them. It was fantastic. Building my base was fun; almost exactly like Rust. Catching monsters is amazing, letting you see the catch rates in real-time above caught Pals' heads. The dungeons are really fun, giving you rewards and boss versions of pals'., Playing with friends, getting your base up together and chatting is also a really fun time. I even got a Pal I was trying to catch stolen by a Turkish guy on a public server, who then started breakdancing on me. A real 10/10 experience.
You start low and it gets higher each pass, so it's 3 successive rolls to catch anything.
But we've talked a lot about other games; let's talk about what Palworld itself has to offer from the well of originality: Firstly, every Pal has animations unique to itself, Pals have existing variants and the lucky system allows you to gain bigger versions of pals on an RNG basis. And of course, there's the base-building which, with the addition of Pals' running things and having to micro-manage them, makes this a unique base-building experience.
Palworld's ultimate strength is that it's already worth more than what we paid for it, and there is more coming throughout early access. In a way, It's exactly what happened with Baldur's Gate 3. It's weird to say, but this might be the sort of passive rebellion phase of gaming without microtransactions, DLC or battlepasses, but promises of improvement without monetary gain, this project is absolutely flourishing the same way Baldur’s Gate did. Palworld is a game made by people who know exactly what they're doing, and it would be a lie to say that they aren't doing it well. The only question that remains is, how are they avoiding lawsuits?
So to sum up, Palworld has the making of a fantastic game. Is it a Pokémon killer? Well, yes but, not in the way you'd expect. Palworld, just by existing, is going to frighten The Pokemon Company. Because if a company like Pocket Pair, which is much smaller than them, can churn out a game that fulfills that itch players have, Players may rebel against their monopoly on monster-catching games. This game is amazing, but it's also incredibly derivative. Yes it improves on what it copies, but it's still a copy just taken to moral extremes and logical fun experience enhancements. The success of this game will have wider implications for the industry, and it's going to be interesting to see what happens next.
This bunny ended up being my favorite, leave a comment which of these critters you like the most!
Doctor Who Woke Up and Chose Violence this Christmas with Baby-Eating Goblins and a Mysterious Old Lady!
It's Christmas! And Doctor Who has brought us one of the most polarizing Christmas episodes I've seen in a long time. There's tons of British humor, the introduction of a new companion, pirate goblins from the sky who kidnap babies for Christmas dinner, and a really confusing old woman who somehow knows key plot points of the show? So grab your CGI Goblin horde as we dive into "The Church on Ruby Road."
Spoilers as usual!
First, I let my guard down, I really did. After Steven Moffat's heartfelt Christmas stories with the Doctor as Scrooge, superhero stories, and the wedding of River Song, I thought Doctor Who was wholesome and loved Christmas, But then one day, Chris Chibnal came and declared "No more Christmas" like a grinchy Scarlet Witch. And Doctor Who was gone from Christmas for about five years. I was so sad.
I hoped the Doctor would one day return to grace our screens at Yuletide. And finally, it did, except I forgot. Christmas is a thing to be feared, and all Christmas traditions are actually here to kill us. At this time of year, Russel T Davies: Evil Showrunner, used to come down from on high, manically laughing "Ho ho ho" as he unleashed killer Christmas trees, evil nutcrackers, The Star of Bethlehem firing death lasers, and that time the entire world became clones of John Simm. This is Christmas to him, a time of destruction, invasion, and blood, and this episode is no different.
I don't think that moose attacks are in the Christmas manual.
Imagine sitting down with your family, ready to enjoy the Doctor Who Christmas special. You're enjoying the new funny man and his adorable new companion, then BAM, An injured woman is murdered by a Christmas tree falling on her. Oops, what about the giant falling Snowman that crushes pedestrians?
Snow problem, man.
Not enough? How about a 3 minute musical dedicated to Goblins eating an orphaned baby? The King Goblin is a nightmarish Jabba the Hut-looking thing, complete with a huge slobbering tongue and a jaw as large as a hippo, literally salivating as Ruby and the Doctor scramble to intervene as the baby rolls down a conveyor belt towards certain doom in its mouth. Strangely, it reminds me of the climax of Toy Story 3, but way darker.
For better or worse, people are definitely going to remember this one for years.
Davies, having too much fun rattling his bone-encrusted holly branch, then adds in an emotionally heartbreaking scenario where the evil Goblins sneak back in time and eat the sweet new companion, freshly stolen from her mother abandoning her on a church doorstep. We saw how much everyone in her life is now full of pain and suffering as she has suddenly disappeared from the present in an It's a Wonderful Life inversion. The camera work and colour palettes paint everything as miserable grey and lifeless, while the Doctor laments her disappearance and swears to save her, being the only one left to remember that she even existed. Merry Christmas!
Did I mention this Doctor cries? I don't think he's ever been this ready to cry. If Gatwa has to keep this up his whole run i'm both gonna feel sorry for the guy and be in awe!
Thankfully, the Doctor is more powerful than any bunch of magical gremlins and uses his sci-fi gloves to literally pull their ship out of the sky and kill them all with a church steeple. Very metal. But Davies is not done. He has one more evil trick up his sleeve; knowing that the rest of the season won't air for six more months, he unleashes a random old woman. Who creepily games into the camera and laughs about knowing what a Tardis is. Creating a tidal wave of theories and questions that will stay with us for the next 6 months.
No, no, no you know what you're doing show, stop it, i'm not spending the next 6 months on wikipedia trying to work out who this is.
Now, here's the deal: I will tell you exactly who this woman is and how she knows what a Tardis is. The show calls her Mrs Flood, but I prefer to call her Anita Dobson from Eastenders, a British Soap opera with more episodes than One Piece. And it's probably something that only the most devout Whovians would know: Doctor Who once had a major crossover event with their show. It was the most cringe and British thing to happen in the 1980s, and it was all for charity, making it somewhat understandable how it existed in the first place.
But the terrible thing is, I can't prove this definitively, and if this old lady turns out to actually be a plot-relevant character and not a reference to a terrible charity special, I may just faint from exasperation.
Let's talk about Ncuti Gatwa's first starring performance. Gatwa is captivating, first being seen at a nightclub dancing, wearing a jumbled outfit of a kilt with a tank top, and oh boy. Pour out a brew for Matt Smith's goofy dancing because this Doctor has some real moves. You can pretty much feel the show manifesting Squidward going, "Oh no, he's hot" in the corner. The camera just loves the guy.
This man is too charismatic, I don't think he even needs psychic paper at this point.
Through the episode, he exhibits manic energy, as is the trend of the show, but also a really athletic talent? At one point, he sprints on all fours, and if I was wearing 3d glasses, I would be terrified; he's so damn fast!
Oh, but wait, what the heck is that Sonic screwdriver… is that Adam Sandler's remote from Click? How is that a screwdriver? Did he just repurpose his TV remote because Tennat's 14th Doctor took the normal one? I gotta say, the design is weird. And anything that makes me think of Adam Sandler is not good for me. My only thought is that they needed it to be round so kids couldn't hit their siblings with the pointy end anymore. Do not like it.
"Screwdriver". However, I love the Gallifreyan alphabet in the middle.
The Doctor saves everyone the Goblins tried to kill with bad luck. No humans were harmed in the making of this episode. However, Gatwa is pretty much solidified as Capaldi's successor to the "*F*** around and find out" club. He will slam you into a church if you do bad stuff. And I am one hundred percent into it. It's the pinnacle of science versus fantasy in that the Doctor uses gravity (Now renamed to mavity as a running joke in the show) to destroy a magical pirate ship.
Insanely cool moment in my opinion.
Now let's talk about "The Outfit," you know, how every Doctor has their own personal defining wardrobe. Gatwa's appears to be a Russel T Davies special, combining the cool action hero style of Tenth's brown trench coat with the grounded serious tones of Eccleston's leather. Or is it? Gatwa also dons a cowboy cat checkered outfit with an orange shirt ensemble, with tones of the fourth and second Doctor's outfits boasting the eleventh's cowboy hat. It's unclear which of these looks is the definitive Doctor suit, but Gatwa's defining trait as the Doctor must be his new ring bling. Which I find stylish but maybe a little flashy. Either way, there doesn't seem to be a wardrobe failure on either end, like the terrible collage they had poor Colin Baker running around in.
I actually forgot about the fingernail symbols, I don't know what they mean but they're cool too.
Finally, Ruby Sunday is played by Millie Gibson; she's the new companion and all-around sweetheart. She's one of those characters who will grab onto a ladder hanging from the sky to save a child; she's the type of person who makes her aging family feel amazing. She's also the type of person pining for her past with an arc of a mother who abandoned her, which leaves the door open for more intrigue later on down the line.
Ruby seems to embody the best parts of Rose Tyler while also maintaining a very grounded personality. While willing to accept the supernatural and scientifically improbable, she's also very much focused on the task at hand, not letting herself feel out of depth. Immediately twigging onto the fact they have to join the crazy baby-eating musical number to throw the goblins’ focus in the middle of the episode. She's inquisitive and provides a great audience stand-in but also feels like an Oliver Twist type. We'll only see more of her as the show goes on, but I feel that her best trait will be her ability to adapt to otherworldly scenarios, making me feel as though Ruby might be a fusion of the personalities of Rose Tyler and Sarah Jane Smith, two of the best companions of the show.
A really good first impression of Millie Gibson for me.
So to recap: Strange Sonic Screwdriver, Ruby is a great companion, Russel T Davies will return next Christmas to terrify us with evil tinsel, and Gatwa is a charisma nuke that's probably going to annihilate every male-attracted person in a 20-mile radius if he is allowed to keep getting away with it.
Finally, I want to mention a pattern I've seen in the last four Who episodes, Davies continues to try to mess with the audience. They change the name of gravity, throw in wild story points, and seemingly use politics not as a platform but as a way to "Troll" people, including a musical about such a dark subject matter in this episode and The Giggle episode poking fun at Twitter.
I can see that the story is getting the love and care it deserves, but I feel this strange attitude towards messing with the viewer. Antia Dobson's inclusion and focus are what I would call a "Red flag" in this episode. Davies' writing is starting to feel like an outlaw doing whatever they want, and hopefully, this doesn't infringe too much on the entertainment value. It's certainly enough to give me slight anxiety anyway. Great episode, though, very memorable!
That's it. What did you think of the episode? Comment below what you think of it, and I'll come have a chat. Have a great 2024!
Did Doctor Who's "The Giggle" Prove It's a Fiery New Start? Madness, Puppets and Politics, the 60th Anniversary Finale
Last time, I wrote an article worried that the show might be focusing its budget on specific episodes. This time, we see that it is absolutely true in the best possible way. "The Giggle" is Doctor Who at its very best and sometimes stumbling. Stinging social commentary that stumbles in places, mixed with outlandish villain antics, all topped off with insane reveals that may in fact, have implications for years to come both in the past and the future of everything Who. We are looking at must-watch TV for any Doctor Who fan here folks, and the reasons why might just be some of the most interesting writing techniques I've seen in a long time.
*Spoilers ahead, watch out!*
This episode begins with the return of the 1st Doctor’s enemy, "The Toymaker", now played by Neil Patrick Harris. From the start, we see him bring some of his amazing flexibility in acting, portraying a stereotype interspersed with terrifying revelations about his disinterest in the value of human life. The next time we see him, he's portraying a different stereotype completely. It's really clear from the offset he is the real deal. He's giving 100% and loving the sadistic character. His villainous leitmotif is his own giggle; he uses it to infect the minds of others to play his games, and you can hear it infect the soundtrack of this episode, almost like he's doing it to the viewer also. It's brilliant!
He does French and German accents, and has outfits to match. Like Megamind once said, the most important thing for a villain is presentation!
It's a really chilling opening, as he hands off a doll that becomes the blueprint for modern media through John Logi Baird's experiments with the creation of television. The doll is terrifying and is actually a replica of the real doll used in these experiments. No wonder everyone's scared of puppets if this nightmarish thing was ingrained in our viewing habits, huh? It was good to see the educational side of Who again, considering Doctor Who was created originally to teach children.
Why do they need such big noses for those puppets?
In 2023, we find that the Toymaker has utilized the doll as an infection on media screens, turning the real world into social media discourse, where everyone spills out their unfiltered thoughts and beliefs without a care in the world. Sadly, Davies doesn't go into the wider ramifications of this, perhaps resulting in coups against dictators around the world and TV networks being forced to revive Firefly Still, we are led to believe this is a very bad thing.
This cascades into commentary on people being paranoid. A cure for a person's brain waves being discussed as a "Conspiracy" that the public rejects and, weirdly, implies a complete lack of faith in other people. I get this is social commentary, but the writing openly seems to think that everyone would go insane when, in reality, people who think similarly would absolutely huddle up and cooperate. It tries to make a face mask or vaccine analogy but fails to understand the finer nuances of the concept, treating it like a wholly bad thing without realizing this would unite as much as divide people. Perhaps an hour-long story with multiple plots wasn't enough time to explore this concept. Quite strange, given the meta-commentary in this episode is on point and brutally decisive.
This is my only problem with the episode. The politics seem very weak and surface level, whereas with a Science fiction show, we're supposed to explore ideas and concepts born from political and social intrigue.
This doesn't really make as much sense when you realise the behavioral changes are seen instantly, unlike vaccines but the show wants to make a point.
This is the first reason why I believe this story should have been a two-part episode, "The Wild Blue Yonder" did not need to exist when this episode could easily have been a trilogy, with "The Star Beast" as the opener and this episode split into two parts. (That would be quite funny actually, considering the Doctor splits into two in this episode).
The Doctor and Donna track the Toymaker back to The Early 20th Century, and they have an amazing back-and-forth argument while the Toymaker throws balls for the Doctor to catch. The sharp choreography implies that dropping the ball during their heated discussion could have dire consequences. Donna eventually catches the ball and doesn't throw it back, which is really clever to me because it means he works on implicit consent for his games. Because Donna is a no-nonsense character, she's his anti-thesis in a way.
I think even the Doctor is kind of scared of Donna sometimes.
The implication is that the human race's consciousness and behavior as a whole is the contract he needs to play his games and that the Doctor is different as a renegade of his species. And Donna can stop games from continuing through sheer force of will, a great call back to the episode "Turn Left" where she similarly averted a world-ending catastrophe through her own determination. The mechanisms in place that each character works around are all perfect. Every game needs a player, and without a willing player, his existence is pointless.
I have to talk about the show's new meme. The Toymaker comically rips apart the Doctor's excuses for his past companions exits/deaths by yelling, "Well that's alright then" with his puppet show whenever he argues against their deaths being tragic, laughing in the face of previous showrunner Steven Moffat, who admittedly wanted his characters to both die and not die at the same time, three times in a row. Poor Rory Williams was killed multiple times, and honestly, I wish he'd been brought up, but, as is typical of Doctor Who, companions like Mickey, Dan, Graham, Yas, Rory and Jack Harkness don't really get mentioned all that much because they weren't the main companions at the time. Ncuti's Doctor even brings up Adric from Peter Davidson's run later in the episode. Toymaker had way more material to work with but maybe he just doesn't like Moffat.
Seems like this one might have become the rallying cry for bad writing decisions everywhere!
Source: Ifunny
Finally, the coup de grace of the Toymakers' performance, a deadly Spice Girls sing-a-long. I'm not joking; he lip-syncs, dances, throws characters into walls, murders two men, and the Doctor gives emotional apologies while Toymaker just can't stop his funky dancing. With the soldier's faces stuck in balloons he's turned them into; it's completely insane and amazing. Jemma Redgrave and Bonnie Langford interact with him really well during the sequence. I almost forgot to mention Langford is here playing 6th Doctor companion Mel Bush, but she doesn't really do anything. I think she's just here as a cameo to celebrate the anniversary. Nice to see her though!
It's a 10/10 scene. Immensely funny.
Wait what? Why are we dancing? Is that the guy from the depressed Netflix show?
Last time, I talked about how Tennant and Tate carried the show splendidly. Well, with Harris here, the cast has almost reached perfection for acting off each other but we can't really go on without talking about the man of the hour.
Ncuti Gatwa makes his appearance via a new type of regeneration, and oh boy, if the episode wasn't good enough already, this made it iconic. They call it "Bi-regeneration", where Gatwa is literally pulled out of Tennant, leaving both Doctors alive. It's confusing and really quite odd Davies would choose to do this right after mocking a previous showrunner for nonsensically allowing his characters to survive.
This also allows a viewer the chance to discount the timeless child reveal from season 11. With the Toymaker noting that he "made a jigsaw of the Doctor's history". Tennant's Doctor would remain that Timeless child in essence, with Gatwas' Doctor being 100% Time Lord in biology, which returns him to the status quo we were used to before that jarring plot point existed. It's an ingenious writing ploy by the team that allows you to decide what you want the show's lore to be.
There was a point I was thinking they were going to have a two headed Doctor, but this works just as well!
His name is pronounced "Shoo-ti Gat-wa" for all us confused native English speakers out there, and he brings a very strong manic energy to the character. Incredibly grounded and confident. He sounds like a big brother you'd trust to take care of bullies. During the three-way, life-or-death catch game, he almost takes out David Tennant's Doctor on accident, getting completely immersed and perhaps showing that he may have some hidden depths, perhaps some scheming tendencies? He takes control of everything as the Doctor for the rest of the episode, immediately sidelining Tennant's incarnation believably and effectively. This is the Doctor now.
While Tennants' new Tardis design was white like a blank canvas, Gatwas' sports a new Jukebox with added yellow mood lighting. He gives off very chill and mellow vibes, like he always has the answer to emotions as well as technology. He seems very emotionally stable, the opposite of Tennant, Which is a welcome change. I would liken him to Christopher Eccleston's Doctor most of all, but time will tell with the Christmas special what kind of Doctor he truly is.
He's not wearing pants in this scene and apparently that was David Tennant's idea, no idea why but it's pretty funny.
Tennant's Doctor got to settle down again, becoming part of Donna's family. It's hilarious how there are now so many versions of the 10th Doctor running around time and space, not to mention the possibility that one day he returns to this particular face again, after all the 50th shows that at some point Tom Baker will be re-used. It does, however, open up a possibility of Donna, her daughter Rose, and Tennants' Doctor doing audio adventures, which would be pretty good in my opinion. The possibilities are endless. *Spoilers end here"
This was an episode worthy of the 60th-anniversary title. While the 50th brought in Multiple Doctors and resolved a massive long-running plotline, this episode resolved a plotline almost 60 years in the making. Bringing back a villain from the past with very modern sensibilities, who is one of the best villains the show ever had. I came out of this episode praying that Neil Patrick Harris would be returning in the future. I also came out feeling like the show was in safe hands with Gatwas' limited performance in the episode. His charm and demeanor make me feel the same as I did with Christopher Eccleston's debut, hopeful and exhilarated. I know the show still has some issues to work through, but I'm confident it can resolve them in an inventive and respectful way to the source material.
One of the best episodes ever made of Doctor Who, if there's nothing else I can say, it's that.
"Where's he going?"
"Everywhere".
Trickery in Deep Space: "Wild Blue Yonder," The Doctor Who 60th Special With Double the Emotions, Hearts, and Pay Checks!
Previously, we saw the return of Doctor Who in what I consider a solid opening to the 60th anniversary specials. This episode follows on from that, taking us into deep space as The Doctor and Donna crash-land the Tardis onto a derelict spaceship. But despite its unoccupied state, danger lurks in the silence. It's a good premise, but we'll be getting into some issues with the episode and what I loved below.
*Spoilers start here*
I want to talk about the story first. This story is a retread of the "Midnight" episode of Tennant's original run, with otherworldly, unknowable creatures stealing memories and forms slowly from the Doctor and Donna in an enclosed and isolated spaceship without a means of escape. These new unnamed monsters turn into corrupted and demonic versions of the two characters and chase them around. Throughout the episode, they get more and more knowledge from our main characters, goading them into opening more of their minds up to them, eventually hoping to take their place, steal the Tardis, and wreak havoc on the universe. Supposedly, they're from outside the edge of the universe, so they hate ours. Like the Grinch looking in on the whos, having fun at Christmas without them.
At least Doctor Who has better corridors than the Flash CW show.
What this means is we get 50 minutes of David Tennant and Catherine Tate having conversations with… David Tennant and Catherine Tate. Showing us what it's actually like playing Among Us with two people. Straight away, we can tell from the green-screened spaceship and the very compact and easy-to-put-together corridors that this episode was probably produced in less time than a typical episode? The sound mixing was a little crazy, with music sometimes blaring over conversations or Tennant mumbling science babble a little bit too quiet to hear. Honestly, they're both amazing actors and can convincingly carry the show by themselves, even with terrifying CGI body morphing on their evil duplicates. But the fact that they have to do it like this, with this little cast and crew, makes this episode feel like a filler episode.
A little bit of introspection never hurt anyone.
That's not to say that this episode was a bad one; I personally really enjoyed the evil doppelgangers aspect, to the point where I was trying to guess which was real and which was fake through every encounter. In fact, there was even a fun bit where the Doctor used a superstitious idea about monsters not being able to cross salt to trick the copies temporarily. Using the essence of what they are to wonder, maybe, just maybe, they would explode from surprise sodium contact. It was a super clever segment, which honestly made me respect the writing, and even later on, they imply that doing something like that near the edge of the universe might just cause some sort of ripple effect. Superstition can become reality, and so the lesson here is, don't throw your black cat into deep space. I got it, Doctor Who; I see you.
Let's talk about the action; there's a fair bit of running in this one. We get to see Doctor and Donna getting chased by crazy inflating Doctor and Donna. At one point, they inflate into a monstrous, corridor-spanning pile of faces and body parts that just might be a tiny bit absolutely terrifying.
This one made me grimace, but in a good way!
Then, after things get kind of confusing as the show turns the actors into a cup and ball shuffle game, round and round they go, where's the real one and where's the fake? Nobody knows if we're following the fakes or the real ones. It's this sort of misdirection that really makes you pay attention to their speech, trying desperately not to let the episode fool you… oh wait, they're talking about something called "The flux". Whoops, I skipped that season; I just started assuming that the Donna that knew about it was reading the script, so she was probably evil. And I was right! I felt so clever.
So, after a little bit of research, I learned that this was the fallout of a previous storyline and addressed the emotional impact. Which is great because it means the show isn't burying its head in the sand. There was a considerable amount of audience dislike for the writing direction of the last few seasons. Addressing it is undoubtedly a good thing and shows confidence. As far as I'm concerned, even the worst plot points can boomerang right back around to being of great use to the narrative with a skilled showrunner (which Russel T Davies definitely is).
What the heck was happening back there?
Finally, at the end of the episode, the Doctor accelerates the ship's self-destruct sequence, exploding the two doppelgangers. This allows for rescue by Tardis since they're about to perish. The Doctor, in a rare goof, rescues the wrong Donna and has to eject them and save the real Donna, who almost dies in a fiery inferno.
The Doctor being fallible is a very human quality to the character that I feel gives stakes to the episode. His look of disdain when he realises and undoes his mistake is more disappointment in himself and I loved to see it. This entire episode had brief moments of the Doctor telling Donna he doesn't know everything. Establishing this is a very good balance. You need weakness in a character to introduce stakes, and this episode definitely had them.
This was a gorgeous bit of CGI to be honest. I love a good spaceship explosion.
At the end of this episode they land back in London and we get to see beloved Bernard Cribbins as Wilf, one last time. It's not clear if he'll be in next week's episode, but a tribute to the actor who passed away ends the episode. Cribbins was the only additional cast member in the episode, and he deserved to be in the spotlight. He was a treasured part of the cast in many incarnations of Doctor Who, and will be missed dearly. As a British man, this guy was essentially everybody's Grandad who watched the show, and we love the guy.
This would be his last broadcasted role. *Salute*
*Spoilers end here*
So, in conclusion, we're looking at an episode that was meant to establish a status quo. How the Doctor is feeling, his relationship with Donna being far more human for both of them without the meta crisis, and the lead into a finale for the three episodes that make up the 60th anniversary special.
The flaws here were that the sound mixing was a bit off, the somewhat rushed nature of the episode, and the lack of additional cast, coupled with slightly confusing dialogue. What this told me is that certain episodes will have more care than others, which is nothing new for Doctor Who, but it's a bit sad to know that production value might be split between episodes. I think every episode should show respect for the viewing experience.
The strengths are in the actors, the clever events that happened within the episode, and the mystery of the villains. The villains, still not named, join those of "Midnight", who represent the unknown present, a threat different from, say, the Daleks ever-present ideological hostility. It's the mystery that brings intrigue.
My opinion is that the show has been shown a tremendous amount of care since its move to Bad Wolf Studios, and experiments like this episode need to happen, but its production definitely has some kinks that need to be ironed out before the show returns fully as a British television staple worthy of its historic mantle.
